The Engagement period:
The groom’s family would kiss the bride’s hand and use a low-priced engagement ring for a week or two to show that they want this girl to marry their son. Then the elderlies of the family decide to ask a Mullah (a clergyman) to perform the ceremony. After that, there is a ceremony named “Shirini khoran” (i.e., a party). At this party the groom’s family bring confectionary and they celebrate the happy event. This party usually does not include a formal meal. This is a part of the wedding some people are invited to; there is music and dancing. The groom’s family brings the bride a beautiful Kurdish dress. During the engagement period, the groom and his family have to do all sorts of works for the bride’s family which often includes tough agricultural works. This period takes a year.
People of this region only have their wedding parties in autumn thus the families would wait for the summer to end to start preparing for the wedding. In the past they used to make a beautiful dress for the bride with a Taqilah (a sort of hat), however, nowadays the brides usually wear a Bahar Narnj (a white gown). The groom’s brother had to use his shawl (in men’s Kurdish suits they wear it around their waist) to turn it over the bride’s head to her feet seven times, the bride had to step on it and then he had to step on it too. It was believed that this was an ancient tradition. They did this in order to endear the new bride to her husband’s family. After they gave the bride her new hat, her brother-in-law had to wear this hat over his own head and over the bride’s head five times. This has had a round form. Finally, they would cover the hat with a red veil and they would take the bride to the groom’s house. The groom had to be on the roof because he was not allowed to take the bride’s hand. He had to toss something like sugar, candy, or dried fruit over the bride’s head. The people would take the bride inside, they would clap and dance and call the groom to come inside. The groom would come and remove the red veil away from the bride’s face.
“Bouk Birdn” (Taking the Bride to the groom’s house)
When a girl is supposed to get married, the bride’s mother or her mother-in-law brings two eggs and puts them in front of their house for the bride and the groom to step on them. Another wedding tradition is that when the bride leaves her parents’ house, her mother-in-law tossed some dried fruit, candies, or toffees over the bride’s head and shoulders. In the old days when there were little candies available, they used sugar and they did this to bring sweetness to the bride’s life. The groom’s mother also made some Halwa, a kind of sweet porridge made with flour and sugar, and she would put a little Halwa in seven pieces of bread and would fold it in the shape of a triangle and she put them under a red blanket that was spread for the bride to sit on. The bride should step on the Halwa seven times so that she would be as sweet as the Halwa. Another tradition is when the bride leaves her parents’ home, she had to turn her face back seven times to the right and seven times to the left in order to gain her parents and her in-laws’ approval.
When the bride would get closer to the groom’s house, some men would ride their horses towards her and they would maneuver with their horses so harshly that sometimes people got injured. This was done to show the happiness of the groom’s brothers. The women escorting the bride would sing a song: Tell the groom his wife’s here.
“Zamakhwan”, Groom’s feast
The next day after the wedding, the bride’s mother prepared a lot of food including meat, chicken and fruit, bread and some other things. She sent this to the groom’s house. They called this tradition “Zamakhwan”. The groom would put some money in the dish and he would send it back to her in-laws.
“Knachechrra” (Inviting the girls over)
On the wedding night, the groom’s parents would prepare a dinner and they would send it to the bride’s parents. This was called “Knachechrra” which means inviting the girls over. Seven women and seven young girls from the neighbors would gather around the bride and they would share the dinner with her. Then every woman or girl would put some nuts, or dried fruit like pears or raisins in a plate or bowl and they would give it to the bride’s mother. She would put it in a chest containing the bride’s belongings so she could eat them the next day. The bride’s father and brothers would buy some new socks as a gift for the groom’s father, brothers, and even male neighbors.
“Sarhorrane”
People used to bake bread in their own houses and during a wedding ceremony, two women (they were the groom’s guests and they would go to the bride’s parents’ house) would bake the bread. The groom’s family would bring a bag of flour about 200 kilograms to the bride’s parents. These two women would bake the bread in the bride’s parents’ house. At the time the women would want to begin to prepare the dough one of the bride’s brothers would sit on the flour bag and refuse to take off until someone gave him some money as a gift. This gift was called “Barawhorrane”. These two women were called “Pawawe” which means the bride’s maids. The bride’s maids would go to take the bride to the groom’s house. These women were supposed to help in the wedding responsibilities. On the night before the wedding day, they would make some special kinds of bread. These women had to help in preparing the meat of the sheep or goat that was supposed to be cooked for the wedding meals.
“Bawani” tradition
After the wedding ceremony was over the bride would come back to her parent’s house after a week to visit them. This was called “Bawani” (Bawan means Father). Her father would give her a calf, sheep, or goat as a souvenir. This present was a symbol of the love they had for their daughter.
